Saturday, April 17, 2010

Hobbies and you.

Most of the time, I'm free (I'm not lazy! Just dun wanna work more than I can). So to be in a good shape I read books, listen eminem, lie to boss or most of the time take a nap. (Should I mention facebook too?)

"A hobby is an activity or interest that is undertaken for pleasure or relaxation" (Wiki knows everything).

Everyone of us has one or two hobbies by nature (if u don't have one, you need to have an doc's advice). It's fun to learn, what is a hobby and what's not! You better read down to know-

BOYS- 1. Staring and whistling 'mentos' breath on girls (it means you don't know but you're cunning).

2. Chain Smoking (sooner or later you'll got T.B.).

3. Drinking (even I'm confused%-)).

4. Having a girl fantasy (you need to live anyway:-P).

5. Lying to parents (I never:-P).

6. Lying to girlfriend/s (It helps sometime :-D).

7. Lying to boss (We've to do it yaar).

8. Spending every dime of a paycheck (those old sunglasses look just fine, guys).

9. Lying to... (Boys are liars? No way!).

GIRLS- 1. Bite your mum's head with gossips (chances are you'll get married soon)

2. Surely, Justin Bieber is not a hobby ;-).

3. Making bed-sheets again and again (What's up dear?).

4. Some dashing personality is eyeing you on the road (i'm busy, please) and you girls are giggling about it (keep emergency number handy:-D).

5. Checking facebook again and again! (oops).

6. Having a boy fantasy (:-P if boys do so, girls also live in the same planet).

7. Sending too much sms (remember! Boys are busy).

8. Calling your boy friend about his wellness (again! Please no)

9. Facebook!

See? How hard it's to know what a hobby is.

In short, things which make you feel happy, while nobody can cheer you up, or bore you to death are hobbies.

If you're obsessed (Justin bieber's got 1,960,069 followers on twitter, including me:-*) that is obsession.

If you're confused about this(yippee, i got the right effect ;-)) try checking http://findmeahobby.com

A very good site indeed.

How dull! You all must be saying. I'm improving it with your support and love. Do follow me by clicking the link above.

I'll be back.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Wake up you Devil!

This blog is in semi-haibernation mode. Actually I got stuck. A serious writer's block (If you think I'm a writer then I surely had!), and slept all the time. Sleeping is one of my most loving HOBBIES other then lying:->.

So who checked my blog in between(hey guys), wait for another sick post;-).

But I would like to have a coffee first.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Guys!!! Please, find me my Valentine!

The good news is that Valentine day is near. The bad news??? I've no honey pie to on my side to be my Valentine!!! (Know what: already dusted my phonebook with no success :-()

Love's in air again. Love birds flying all over. BUT... That old dumb crow(please read Pankaj:-@) is still alone, no females around, dah!;-(

My buddies are surging around, planning there dream day(or night;-)), there gifts, there venues to meet. Everyone seems like running for there life!

Here are some pre-mating(meeting):-D comments they make:

"This Card is looovely, but the teddy which comes with it, is smaller than a thumb. Ain't got money for bigger, shit!
"

"That restaurant has good coffee, but that other one has secluded cabins, mmmm!"

"Goodness, I dun've nothin new to wear, I'm gonna look like that same old chicken, ooh!"

"She doesn't want me to wear this horseshit perfume... Ok I'll bath twice :-P goody goody!"

**You know what? I'm really jealous and going to scream, Argh!**

I'm thinking about it, just when my inner voice pops up: "Don't be a loser Pank, you've got lots of time on you. Why dun find a... Umm... Beautiful... Umm gorgeous chick for you?"

"I've already shaken every bush, with no success. Know something? That's why the government is desperate about maintaining woman-per-man ratio." I sigh.

"Hmmm," my inner voice frowns. "Why dun you call someone nicey?"

"You know what? My phonebook has 1000 contacts, only 20 girls in it. Talk about that ratio thing."

"Maybe one of them. What do you say?"

"No way! Among these 20; 15 are my sisters- either by birth or accident :-D. And the other 5 are... Yuk. What do you mean, huh?" I frown back.

"What about Social Networks? Anyone sexy, what say, Pank?"

"Oh yeah, you want me to buy ticket to California? What an idea. Why dun you take your time to be realistic and shut up, while I think of something."

"Ok then, use your Einstein brain to solve this 'Theory of girly relativity' yourself."

Now, inner voice gone to ponder, leaving me alone to plan for victory :-D. It's just five minutes and devil roars again.

"What about locales?"

"Hmmm... Humour me."

"What about the girl next door, who smiles every time you're on terrace?"

"Do you believe she is a girl, at all?"

"She is not?!"

"Of course she is! But what I'm searching is Umm... Night black hair, eyes as deep as a lake, rose like lips, sandal-wood skin..."

"You are talking about Katrina Kaif!!! Not you?"

"Ah... Ok, ok tell me whom do you prefer?"

"Jyotsna?"

"She has a bad breath. Yuk."

"Sunita?"

"She talks off my head. A real fm station."

"Raani?"

"Don't you think she'll look nice with less lipstic?"

"Tanya?"

"Wo-ho! I dun want everyone laugh at me. Dun joke, please."

"Akansha?"

"Must be pre-booked :-D."

"Anita?"

"Dah, that buffalo?God!"

"Ok then, I've a last suggestion." Inner voice lowers the volume, like telling a secret thing.

"Shoot it."

"You must somehow find Katrina's number, and if you couldn't, take no less then Kareena Kapoor's he he."

"SHUT UP:-@."

Guys, look at my condition. No one is messed up like this. Please help finding me my Valentine. I'm really gonna cry, Mummy...

**Moral of the Story: Always keep backups, you fools! Ha ha.**

Like it? Please comment. Also don't hesitate to pass it to friends.

Monday, January 25, 2010

Embarrassed?? Well here are some tips...

Yesterday was solid bitter for Congress Party. The advertisement sarcasm blown on full. Opponent parties are leaving no chance to earn some more votes by calling the event exasperating and embarrassing.

News channels also pouring petrol in the fire by speaking the word, 'embarrassment' 2 times in a sentence, well well it has a impact on the masses. Every viewer is embarrassed now because news reader thinks so. Poor viewers!:-(

Man! Give me a brake! It seems like biggest 'karo ya maro' incident of the week, other then india's stinking sewers and abyss-deep potholes on roads.

Well here are my tips to escape from such a BIG EMBARRASSMENT...

1. For opponent parties: Guys improve your G. K. Congress already has her biggest embarrassment as Shashi Tharur so try to salt that already open wound. And have patience! Wound will take time to stink, for much better effect have some Yamuna water handy( to wash the wound:-D)

2. For normal people like me: Are ya really embarrassed? Wow you're the real patriots to India! Fools!

What if the advertisement has photo of Pakistan's former Air Force head?

At least he's handsome more than our leaders!B-) And image quality is more crisp than our leaders blurry images while taking bribes. :-DAnd please congress is not after this scam. It's the eternal leg- pulling mentality of Indians. Come on it was a little mistake of graphics designer. Who i think is already lost job and girlfriend both.

So just think, to whom it is more embarrassing? The graphics designer or you?%-)

So I ask you all to mind your own business. Spread the love. Smile like an ass to everyone you meet. And just don't give a fuck!

Man! Life was never that beautiful, wow!;-)

Happy Republic Day!